Baby steps....

After a difficult day, tonight there were some treasured moments. At one point both girls were on my lap, and E was tickling S, and we were all laughing big belly laughs. Then S hugged me all on her own, it was a tight squeeze. She usually just leans in. Two great moments shining through the fog of adjustment.

It's harder than I thought...

I love my new daughter dearly. But it's hard to wrap my mind around the fact that I missed 5 and 1/2 years of her life. It's just not natural. I wish she was younger, and home, but I know that couldn't be, so I have to make peace with it any way I can.

I love this Chinese proverb...

An invisible red thread connects those destined to meet, regardless of time, place, or circumstance. The thread may stretch or tangle, but never break. -- Ancient Chinese Proverb

Language Explosion ...

A language explosion today. It sounded sort of like a toddler. "Mommy car!" "Mommy bus!" "Mommy airplane." "Mommy snow." "Mommy please." "Mommy help." "Mommy me." LOL. Now where's the off button. Just kidding. :)

When she was sick last night, she very much needed me for the first time, and I think that has put us in a different place. We shall see if it lasts. At least it is possible.

S. is still being very stand off ish to E. E. tries so hard to be a good big sister, and help her, and care for. And S. just gives her the stare down still. Ugh. Time will heal. God willing. All we need is time.

Deeply troubled,,,

Little Miss. S was sick tonight. Sick to her stomach. I rubbed her back, and cleaned up after her. I gave her sprite, and crackers, and rocked her back to sleep, and tucked her into bed.

There are 160 million orphans in this world. Who is wiping their tears? Who is tucking them into bed at night?

I am deeply troubled by the orphan crisis. What can we do?

Today...

Part of the problem is she is trying her hardest not to sleep. But tonight, finally, she fell asleep, and stayed asleep. Yeah.
Today I heard a couple of sentences. One was, "Mommy, banana, please." Another was, "I love you." Another was, "Hi, gilly," to our fish. Ahhhh, progress. :)

Adopting a 5 and 1/2 year old, it's not for wimps, and sissys I tell ya.... :) ...

S. has night terrors. She screams out. It's a little disturbing.
She is also being very stubborn about learning English, and talking in general.
She makes me work for it ladies. But when I finally get a hug, or a smile, it's like gold.
Today she got 5 shots, and some blood drawn. She is holding a grudge. Even a $ 5 stuffed animal from Kohl's Cares For Kids didn't put me back in good graces.
I'm wondering how she will do at the dentist.